Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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