508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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