I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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