it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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