Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
