i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Its about making memories worth repressing
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
