and you said cock pushups were impossible
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize