One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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