Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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