In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
