Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Success! We fucked roommates!
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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