I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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