He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
