uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I have feelings that need drinking.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
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