Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
