White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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