I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
