3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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