Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
