i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
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