Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
