i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Randomize