That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Randomize
