ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
