I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
