we have pet lesbian snakes
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize
