So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize