my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Randomize
