im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
