Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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