I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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