You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
