with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
