Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
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