Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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