I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
Randomize