Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
