I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Randomize