Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
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