How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize