how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
