her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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