My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
We don't watch enough power rangers
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Randomize