nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Randomize
