people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
