I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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