Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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