so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
