How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
