OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
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