All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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