can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
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