guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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